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I don’t share this song story lightly, or with the expectation of it being viewed as some personal victory after struggle. This story is not about me overcoming anything in my own right, because I didn’t. This is a story of submission and surrender, and of a God who paves the way for healing and victory when all we have the strength to do is kneel at His feet.
I remember driving home after the final rehearsal for our recent album, Live at the Black Box Theatre. It was early May 2019 -- the trees were just beginning to bloom, and life was returning to the world after the coldest Wisconsin winter I’d ever experienced living here in nearly eight and a half years.
It was a Monday.
I just rolled into work at our Winona campus, ready to start another week of ministry. The start of my week usually begins with some kind soaking prayer and worship (it helps after a weekend of pouring out, to start your week getting poured into) and pacing the chairs of the worship center to pray over them. Then I got a phone call.
It was my Mom. My sister just had a miscarriage.
…going into recording “One Desire” for the Black Box project was such a season for me -- my husband runs as hard and passionately as I do, and one day after a long rehearsal we were driving home in the evening and had to pull over because Aaron was having heart-attack-like symptoms.
When we worship, we’re not telling God who He is for His good, we’re doing it for our good. We are declaring to our own hearts the truth of who God is and trying to capture in song how our hearts feel in response to His glory, to His power and majesty, to His sacrifice, and to His redemption - to let the truth of what He has done through the power of Jesus penetrate a little bit deeper into our hearts.